I really wanted to do it. There was nothing that was going to stop me, nothing to stand in my way. And I can’t do it. I know I can’t.
The Tour de Cure is this coming Sunday and with life being crazy and my motivation non-existent I am not prepared to do the 32 mile ride I signed up for.
Like I said yesterday it makes me feel like a failure. But a comment from Karen made a lot of sense to me. If I only do the 8 mile ride, that will be 8 more miles I will ride than if I didn’t do it at all. And that is a distance I know I can do although still going to be hard in my state.
Maybe it would be better to take a little slower? Maybe not trying to push myself too hard in a hurry is a good idea? Maybe not hurting myself should be part of the plan? Now I sound like an idiot for feeling the way I did!
Still, there is a level of embarrassment for me. Physically I look like I should not even get on a bike but deep inside this bulky skin suit is someone with the desire to be active. I know it. I can feel it.
So now I have 5 days to hit my donation goal or I don’t get to ride. I had a goal of $2000 I wanted to reach but now, I have to reach $200 or I cannot ride. A whole zero has been removed. Yikes!
Please pass this on too if you know someone else who be willing to help a ninja out.
Thanks and GO RED RIDER!